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Posts Tagged ‘up all night’

as a new mom with new other new mom friends, i’ve learned a few things that you do and don’t share with your other mom friends about your baby. namely the don’ts. because we all want to keep our new mom friends, right? right.

and nobody wants to be that mom. you know the type. the ones who brag about how amazing their children are, how their babies were playing mozart by ear on the piano at six months and that they’ve already been scouted for the NHL. so don’t be that mom. unless you want to get served a cool glass of shut the he…. ahem.

now, i don’t think i’ve gotten myself into this situation. i still have my mama friends. and how i love them dearly. but i’ve naively come close.

it all began when i started to let the world know that April was magnificently sleeping (ok, almost sleeping) through the night. but to me she was sleeping through the night…aka til 4:30am, because let’s face it. having your baby sleep until 4:30, rather than midnight, after you’ve only been sleeping for little over an hour yourself, is sleeping through the night. but telling this to your mama friends is worse than telling them that your baby can play mozart with her eyes closed. it’s worse than saying that labour wasn’t so laborious. because labour doesn’t last for months. but your baby being awake in the night, every night does.

so when April finally slept past midnight, and i checked that she was still breathing…i was overjoyed, ecstatic, refreshed! a new woman! i could get out of bed at nine in the morning without feeling as though i’d been hit by a train…a train pulling emotional weepy cars, at that. all because i didn’t give in to the little squeaks that April made when she would start to wake up. i’d be up faster than a flash and whipping that soother back in her mouth faster than you can say wah! but it wasn’t easy. some nights she actually would howl (as Rob said, like a little wolf) for a few minutes before she realised her efforts were fruitless and she may as well hunker down for a few more hours of sleep. we felt cruel indeed, but it only took a few nights of adjusting for everyone.

and i wanted to tell all my mama friends that April was finally sleeping! not in a bragging sort of way, but more of a hot damn, i’ve survived the first few months of new motherhood! kind of way. and then i realised…this is not the way to make friends. and April didn’t even start sleeping through the “night” until she was three months old. i only realised this kind of sharing is not cool when i heard other moms talk of their babes sleeping through the night at three, eight or ten weeks and it made my blood boil…. weeks, you say!!!!!????? weeks?! because i don’t know how old April is in weeks anymore. she’s too many weeks for me to still be keeping track of her age in weeks. when someone says eight weeks, you can figure it out pretty fast, but when you’re getting up into the high teens…it’s time to move to months, friends. months. and yes. for months, i dragged my ass out of bed sometimes three times a night. i didn’t even know the meaning of night anymore. April would be chowing down and i’d have my head leaning back on the sofa, trying not to conk out, begging her to drink faster so that i could crawl back into bed and hopefully pass out before she wanted to eat again. sleep? you ask? what sleep?

so unless you can wave a magic wand over your friends’ babies heads’ to get them to sleep, don’t brag to them about your baby sleeping. offer advice, and hugs. but remember that every baby is different. don’t compare. and keep the rest of it to yourself.

asleep

clearly not asleep.

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